Old Man Winter, it's time we had a talk. This relationship has fizzled. You've become overbearing. Predictable. Boring. All you want to do is stay home and sit on the couch and keep me from taking halfway decent photos.
Sure, I know Sexy Springtime has his problems as well, what with all his blue skies and luscious breezes, beckoning me to wallow in his grassy fronds rather than fondle my Pfaff. Sexy Springtime is a monogamous sort. Whereas you definitely allow me the freedom to play with my machinated lovers in your dimly lit, cold dusky hours...
...yes, ours is an open relationship. But even so, I'm beginning to feel claustrophobic. This fancy double ended open zipper stays altogether shut these days.
And let's not even talk about why I'd make a sleeveless quilted jacket. I must be acting out. As if you'd allow me to show a little skin. You might be okay with me fooling around on the side, but you sure don't want me flaunting it.
I mean, I even went off the rails and cinched the waist of this jammy in for you. Would you notice? Throw me an appreciative glance, a flirtatious word? Noooooooo. And I don't blame you. It's a puffy jacket, godsakes. But check the technique:
I encased in leather for you, man. LEATHER. WHAT IS SEXIER THAN LEATHER.
Yeah, whatever Winter. It's too late, I don't want to hear it. We're done. Go be Australia's Valentine.
(I love you Australia.)
(ps ETA: it's a Burda mag pattern circa 2008. Too cold to find it. I'll groundhog it out soon!)
(further ETA: it's Burda mag, 10-2008-123 *not an affiliate link, obviously I'm super on top of that so far* aaaand check out Amanda's gorgeous version, which helped me visually during construction.)