10.07.2017

Declaration of Intent: Commenting on Your Comments.

oonaballoona | by marcy harriell | Declaration of Intent: Commenting on Your Comments.

oonaballoona | by marcy harriell | Declaration of Intent: Commenting on Your Comments.

oonaballoona | by marcy harriell | Declaration of Intent: Commenting on Your Comments.




This skirt, made over the course of one day in early June, became an instant favorite of mine. I reached for it every chance I got. Sadly, it fell into abandonment just as quickly as it took to stitch it, because the last time I wore it, I was in an unfortunate situation with a difficult, offensive personality. And it takes a lot to offend me. I wore it as armor, but it suffered battle scars. In the space of one day, this once adored garment became a tinged reminder of that event.


I gave it a cooling-off period, and the memories of that obnoxious personality have now faded, just in time for the crisper weather which this heavy metallic yardage is actually best suited for (I mean, should Mother Nature decide that we get to keep seasons).

Beautiful People, I'd like to keep this space as a favorite spot. I don't want to have to give this small corner of the web a cooling-off period. But lately, I've been giving it the side-eye, wondering what offense I might unintentionally provoke.

I've recently had a nice little run of offending folks, unawares. From the description of my closet, to the use of the term spirit animal. The latest in a string of self-set booby-traps happened last week, in the form of a typo.

This gorgeous, clear blue-skied week, we woke up daily to the next atrocity that somehow impossibly overshadowed the previous impossibly terrible thing, which overshadowed the last thing, and the countless things before it, and it feels insurmountable. There are too many things in this world that we cannot fix, so we focus on the things we can fix. I GET IT. But we lose sight of the people behind the things we're fixing.

I'm not easily offended. I'm confident. I'm vocal. I'm strong. Which is not to say that others are or are not any of those things. But those qualities in me, coupled with the fact that I'm (racially speaking) a little bit of everything and not enough of anything, make up a person who wears what she wants, says what she wants, and doesn't get too concerned about what others think of her.

The latter part of that sentence hasn't been the case lately, mainly because the last thing I want to be perceived as, in this quivering world, is an agent of more sadness--even unintentionally. So I spend hours worrying and responding (hopefully, thoughtfully) to over a hundred comments on months worth of posts where landmines loomed unseen.

YEAH, SO WHAT. Blog comments. What a silly, inconsequential worry in the face of the world we live in.

But it is a worry, small as it is. A worry that I do not have the energy to carry, especially when the conversation ends out in the ether of the internet, and I’m left wondering if my thoughtful responses have even been read by those that started the ball rolling. I've considered turning off the comments altogether, but in this age of mindless, unconnected interacting through screens, the sewing world is an anomaly--we want to have a discussion. And blog discussion, despite being down elsewhere, is still very much happening here.

So, I'm not going to turn the comments off. I’m not going to delete comments. I’m not saying you shouldn’t have your response and share it (although in this age of public "calling out", the occasional private "calling in" might be a more productive choice). Speak your mind! This is, contrary to unpopular belief, a free country. But, if your very first comment here is about the ways in which I have hurt or offended you, or if your comment's sole purpose is to tell me how I am wrong with no explanation, or even if I just don't have the energy: I am going to give myself the option to pass on putting myself into a tailspin. I will instead direct you to this post, specifically, this last bit:

It is impossible to live a life where you offend no one. Although it is my wish that you have a Great Good Time while you're here, I also understand that my sense of humor, sense of style, and sense of English may not be everyone's cup of tea. (Or coffee. Or gin. Or room temp water.) But if my off-color humor doesn't suit you, if I misstep, if I use a word that is a trigger for you, if there is a new word in our ever-changing lexicon that I misuse, it is most certainly NOT my intention to hurt or offend you. I intend to make you laugh. I intend to inspire you to live colorfully. I intend to provide you a breather in the middle of the madness.

And once in a while, I'll even talk about sewing.

102 comments:

  1. Thanks to you, I have a fabulous maxi Ankara skirt of my own now... so I'm grateful for the discussions you've prompted! I 100% support your last-paragraph statement though, and I'd add that as readers, we are each responsible for what we choose to read and how we choose to interpret and react to things. Thanks for the awesomeness you share with us!

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    1. Yes!! I was just thinkimg the same thing. You are not responsible for people's reactions to your choices and I feel that you've been raked over the coals unfairly of late. I gave 2 mental health disorders and at least 2 autoimmune diseases, both of which are chock full of potential triggers. BUT only if I choose to react to them. I'm sensible enough to realize that my creative friends would never use any triggers intentionally.

      This is a sewing blog, primarily, and it's a place I happily visit for fun, laughter, and pretty things. I love your style - writing, sewing, and living.

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    2. I meant to direct my comment to Marcy - blame my brain fog, ok?

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    3. Gillian, I second what you're saying. One of my (many) favorite quotes is something along the lines of "other people's opinions are none of your business." Why? Because there is no way you can control them (they are shaped by their own filters and previous experiences and life lessons) so it's futile to try, and if you did try, you wouldn't be living the authentic, beautiful, and inspiring life that you are. (And by you, I mean both of you!)
      The most inspiring thing about you, Marcy, is that you have so much courage to unabashedly be exactly who you are, to the point that we, readers, feel like we know your spirit. All i want to ask of you is that you keep doing exactly that. We need more of that in the world.

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    4. I also agree with Gillian (and Sarah below -it would seem we Canadians are strong proponents of free speech). What I would like to your last comment is no one is making anyone read your blog. If people don't like what they are reading or they're offended, they should stop reading your blog and not attempt to deprive the rest of us from the wonderfulness that is you. There is no law that protects you from being offended so you have to stop going to places where that happens.

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  2. I was raked over the coals earlier this week by a peer who was deeply offended at something I posted on Facebook. And I let it tear me up and send me right back to when we were adversaries in ninth grade English.

    I want to be able to have difficult conversations while still setting boundaries for my own health, happiness, and creativity. Thank you for setting these boundaries for yourself and doing so in a way that is public so others have an example to follow.

    I'll keep hanging out in this colorful, creative, crazy spot you have made for us.

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  3. One cannot hope to never offend unless one is bland as can be, and you are never bland. We all need to be ourselves, and others will think what they want. Just be you, that’s why I read your blog. I don’t have to agree with everything I read, I have to accept that you are fully entitled to say what you want in your blog. So keep at it!

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  4. I've banished items of clothes that sadly had been associated with less than pleasant memories even though they were still in perfectly good condition. I'm glad that didn't happen to this maxi skirt because it's so awesome and you look great in it. Your blog has always been a joyful spot to visit, don't change a thing.

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  5. I’ve been online long enough to have seen whole communities get shut down by over critical remarks and hurt feelings. Everyone is so afraid of the negative response that they can’t say anything at all. The personal statement you make in this post is spot on but I’m sorry you had to make it. Please do not let the Softshell Crabs of the world stop you from being you, Marcy! I have so enjoyed your blog from the very beginning - your down-to-earth personality, your hilarious sense of humour, your perfectly-you clothes, your amazing hair (a character in its own right!) and your delightful photos. Carry on.

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  6. I don’t post much on blogs, but I can’t pass this one without saying something. You are a breath of fresh air in a world gone to an extream of self-centered bias toward finding things to be offended about. I LOVE reading your blog. You make me laugh. Sometimes you make my eyes go wide with the beauty of what you create - and sometimes with what you say. You have given so much of yourself to this sphere of the world - all of it good, compassionate and kind - that I would think people could read what you write without passing judgement on you. They should know better.

    So, here’s a toast to the beauty you create, the inspiration you give to the muse’s of others and the giggles I get reading your blog.

    And don’t banish the skirt. It’s way too cool.

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    1. I was going to comment but you took the words right out of my mouth. I wholeheartedly agree with you.
      So Marcy, please never stop being you. Is it not a wonderful thing that even over here (the Netherlands) you reach out to people with your vibrant and bubbly personality (and creations.) Your blog is one of my favourites. There is already so much negativity in the world. Don't let it effect your little joyful corner of the web.

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  7. I've commented once or twice before though I don't remember how anonymously or under what pseud. But I really wanted to come out and say how much I *LOVE* your blog. How much I look forward to it. I confess, I don't read many sewing blogs. Because many of the sewists are making fine and lovely garments that just don't speak to me. Your work ALWAYS speaks to me. I know and can feel that you are here in these dark days and being affected by them as strongly as anyone. But your work lights up the universe. It glows. It expands the world a little bit. Your sense of colour, play, proportion, shape, adventure. I don't know what we're on this planet for so I've decided what I'm here for is to try to add a little beauty - whether that's by compassion and kindness or by literally making art. And you inspire me by the beauty you put into the world through your amazing design eye and through the kind and smart words you have to say.

    I think we're all so on edge and brittle right now and I hope we can all find a bit of kindness and generosity of spirit toward anyone who's trying to build, not break. And I thank you for making this lovely space, this refuge and harbour.

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  8. I know how you feel about the clothes. They seem to absorb negativity and sometimes need an exorcism to free them from the bad times they experienced. And I'm not one to believe that inanimate objects absorb spirits, and I know logically it's all in my mind, but still. I've had to get rid of clothes that I was wearing when I got very bad news, like the death of a loved one. I love fibers so much that I associate them with emotions, glad or sad. I'm glad the bad vibes from your beautiful skirt have faded, now it's time to make happy memories in that skirt to force out any lingering sadness.
    I've read your blog for several years. Don't change a thing. Most of us can feel the kindness and love behind your words, even if the words are sometimes garbled.

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  9. Thank you for your thoughtful response to some very personal comments made about your blog recently - I am fortunate to have never been offended by anything you have posted and continue to find you a ray of sunshine, colour and fun in an increasingly gloomy world x 😍

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  10. Thank you for your comments...I believe we make the world better by doing our best to brighten our corner of the world. thank you for adding brightness to my corner. And I am sorry if someone was intentionally not nice.....shame...

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  11. Oh! I forgot to say this in my comment on your other blog post, but you are totally right- I see the value in speaking with someone in private about sensitive topics and/or criticisms! I wasn't offended by your last post (and I didn't intend to criticize- if it came off that way, I am sorry), but a private conversation about it would have been so much smarter on my part. Thank you for the reminder :)
    cue music: everboooooody's leeeeearninnnnnnng thiiiiiiiiiings!!!!

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  12. Oh dear. I'm sorry you've had to deal with this negativity coupled with the depressing state of the world and current events. A great thing about blogs is that you can simply click "unfollow" should someone say something that rubs you the wrong way, or send a private email should you feel the need to argue. Posts sometimes get serious, but really, we're mostly here to share our common interest and enjoy one another's company. And, of course, to be inspired by wonderful people like you!

    I hope you receive a wave of positivity from this post that will replace the bad associations you have with the skirt, because it's way too amazing to not wear happily! You used this fabric so perfectly!

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  13. I love your blog no matter what - carry on girl!!!

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  14. I hope some of these comments reflect back to you some of the sunshine and gladness you bring to others.

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  15. I'll add to the chorus of thanks for your sunny spirit and the gorgeous clothes you make and document for our enjoyment. And hope that someday I'll see you sing in person...the performances that show up on YouTube are awesome!

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  16. You know, I am jelly of your hair. It may sound very strange coming from a white girl...but I truly wish on Thursdays and Sundays that I had that kind of volume.
    (these are the hardest days of the week - Thursday is not FriYAYAY and Sunday means you have to go back to wrk...)

    Also, when were these picture taken?! This week? WHY IS IT SO NICE THERE?! We got rain and rain and rain and darkness and rain and wet snow.

    OH! I cut back on caffeine!I allow myself two cups of real coffee in the morning. Totes sucks (so not energized) but I am hoping it will keep me calmer. Also, I am hoping it will somehow magically help me quit smoking...

    Ok, I am pretty sure I have a ton of more random stuff to say but I will cut it here.

    And I am pretty sure half of it is misspelled :D

    Still like you a lot!

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  17. Simply put, you bring light and joy to troubling times. Please don't let the muck that some readers fling, intentionally or unintentionally, stick to you.

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  18. You are a treasure. I returned to sewing just as you began, and you & your blog have inspired and challenged me to think better, sew with abandon, laugh harder and consider more deeply. I am not alone in regarding you thus. We need each other to make it through, so know that your followers are indeed out here, linking arms for you and each other

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  19. Oh honey. You just talk. We love you.

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    1. What Denise said! You just talk, we LOVE you. Your posts are thoughtful and thought provoking and inclusive. Keep being you - your nook is a place I go for beauty, creativity, sanity, and gravity when this world gaslights me and makes me lose my grip. Keep on keeping on!

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    2. Amen to all that Cadi and Denise said. Marcie, YOU SPARKLE! In this world of ever-increasing horrors, you help to keep me sane. Your personality is both sweet and sharp - very invigorating. Your creations are wonders to behold. When I see Oonabaloona in my inbox, I eagerly open the message.

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    3. I agree - love your voice and the clothes the clothes TDF Kai pai from NZ

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  20. I can feel your joy and positivity through whatever screen I'm reading your blog or looking at your lovely creations on. THAT is a feat of awesomeness and worth a whole lot when the world is bleak. You are gracious enough to share your creativity with strangers on the internet and I, for one, am grateful you continue to choose to do so!

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  21. Marcy please keep being you - I love visiting your blog And seeing what amazing things you've created.
    I LOVE that skirt.
    Heather in NZ

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  22. Also: I have OCD. It's a sucky thing. When people say "I'm kinda OCD about print matching" or some such thing, the appropriate response is not to get in their face about it. The appropriate response is to chuckle, think "oh, you have no idea!" and continue to admire their awesome work. I KNOW WHAT YOU MEANT. And that's enough 😊

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  23. Yeah. The other day I said I had I had a "dyslexic moment" in front of a whole bunch of strangers, and even though no one commented or even raised an eyebrow, I felt so badly that I spent 15 minutes explaining and backpedaling. Unfortunately, during my explanation, I said "Jesus Christ", so then I felt I had to apologize for that...

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  24. In a world of Instagram avocados, you are a beautiful, gold pineapple. Don't change, don't apologize. It's your space, someone will always have a beef, but what evs. It's your space. Keep being beautiful, this world needs it! xoxo

    P.s. I got your back in a bar fight.

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    1. Silvia, I reached for the 'like' button so now I have to reply. I'm there with you standing behind Marcy in the fight. Marcy, you inspired me to buy 3 pieces of gorgeous waxed cotton and I'm going to wear it with intention. Don't change or withdraw because of some thin skinned folks looking for offense.

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    2. I'm there with you.

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    3. Me, too! I'm pretty handy with my cane, especially in a bar fight! :D

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    4. All of this! I definitely have Marcy's back in a bar fight!

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    5. Can I join the bar fight brigade?

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  25. If people get offended then that's entirely their right. It DOESN'T mean that you aren't entitled to speak from your heart on YOUR blog.

    For me, you're utterly charming- funny, whimsical and a little bonkers. And I love it.

    Also, I'm with Silvia - got your back, Jack!

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  26. If people get offended then that's entirely their right. It DOESN'T mean that you aren't entitled to speak from your heart on YOUR blog.

    For me, you're utterly charming- funny, whimsical and a little bonkers. And I love it.

    Also, I'm with Silvia - got your back, Jack!

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  27. I think your approach is 100% right on, Marcy. Kind but centered, thought out and not belabored. Trust yourself, just like we trust you.

    You're an inspiration, a delight, a hilarious and kick ass sewing lady/actress. The folks who are in a dark enough place in their own lives to post negative comments on your blog (SO glad I haven't seen any of them) will, hopefully, find enough light in their lives to benefit from your blog. Good luck to them.

    Meanwhile, that skirt is AWESOME!!!!

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  28. -loud applause-

    You're a beautiful soul. Keep on being you, don't let folks bring you down. You need to fly, and give the rest of us joy and maybe a bit of inspiration.

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  29. Mate. You're brilliant. And flawed, and funny, and warm. I only wish I had half of your personality and talent - and commitment to a blog, to be quite honest! Don't let people being shitty dim your light, because frankly you're a breath of fresh air. We love you. LOVE.

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  30. You have been an agent of absolute GLADNESS to me, allowing me to find inspiration and joy in our shared love of fabric, style, color, and sewing! Keep on being you. xxoo

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  31. Lovely One, your blog gives great joy to this very old lady and in return may I give you this little bit of wisdom.
    Be who you are and say what you feel because those who matter don't mind and those who mind don't matter"
    Thanks for being you.
    Donna in Canada

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    1. Grins to you up there in Canada from this older reader down here. For Marcy, THANK YOU for the effort you make. It counts for so much!!!

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    2. What a good comment, Anon, must remember it.

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  32. Girl!! You be you...and let the others...GO!! This is YOUR blog! Be who you want. Write what you want. (And for that matter...if you are so inclined...delete who you want!!!) This is YOUR space. We are guests in it. It is your virtual LIVING room - literally and figuratively! For my part, I have enjoyed and been uplifted by your blog since my sister shared it with me years ago. It was about the time you used the phrase, "No Ugly Insides." We were having a particularly dark time just then, and it has become a little bit like a mantra for us. Thought you should know. You are a light. Don't let naysayers dim it!

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    1. Amen sister! No ugly insides! And no uglies allowed inside Oona's blog!

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  33. P.S. I also appreciate what you do for the sewing community. For instance, I recently asked several folks with sewing blogs how they care for their African Wax Print fabrics. Now, I'm sure they are busy peeps...I hold no grudge...BUT...YOU were the ONLY one who answered. I appreciate that! THANKS!!!

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  34. This appears to be a joyous garment and as such deserves to be worn. I am old, fat, white, American living in another country than to which I was born and still I laugh loud, pronounce words differently and take joy where it comes. Girl I respect you for doing more than I have done.

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  35. Yes to all of this! Especially giving yourself permission to not respond to ugliness. It's exhausting, trying to keep up with what is least likely to cause offense these days. And I, for one, have long enjoyed your writing style so much! I'd hate to see you feel the need to stifle your unique style, in words or fabric. (Love the skirt!)

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  36. I love that you still even *get* comments. Blogging has been... different in the last few years.

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  37. I am so glad that someone has said this! I have been really amazed these last few months at the times in online discussions where people have even been going out of their way to be kind but have been verbally beaten up for not saying things completely "pc" as defined at that moment. You write vivaciously and I love to see your ambitious sewing projects. Keep up the good work!

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  38. I have so enjoyed your blog and appreciate all the time and care that you put into it. You do a great job of keeping it feeling personal and intimate and true to YOU, and I am awed by your bravery and confidence in all that you share with an internet full of strangers. I agree that people are definitely entitled to their own opinions, but when it comes to taking offense to what is obviously so well-intentioned and thoughtfully shared, it's time to step back and remind ourselves that "this is NOT about ME." I think so many conflicts could be avoided if we all remind ourselves of this more often. And I love your skirt, but I love the smile on your face even more! Thank you!

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  39. Brava!! Everyone has said it all. Love your style, your blog and your beauty. Please, keep on blogging.

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  40. Oonaballoona, love your style and wish I could sew better!

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  41. That skirt is phenomenal, for some reason I'm intimidated by the idea of wearing maxi skirts but you makes me want to throw caution to the wind!

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  42. Oona you are a joy, every time I see one of your posts I am happy because you will either make me smile or make me think. As a 61 year old white woman living in rural North of the UK I feel your wonderful spirit. THankyou.

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  43. Oh Marcy! When you pop up in my inbox I click IMMEDIATELY or save the new message for a quieter moment (I have two small boys - enough said). I never used to really read the comments TBH, just your post and look at the pictures and wonder what your genealogy was with that beautiful head of hair, or where you met your husband and how wonderful that you are so in love and so supportive of each other. I enjoy juxtaposition of big issues and a beautifully made garment. This is your piece of the internet but I am realising that a lot of people actually choose to be offended even when it s clearly NOT the intention - what can you do? I hope this remains a happy place for you! A glimpse at the comments shows me that a lot of other people love this space!

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  44. I love your blog - it was one of the first I found when I started sewing. Your voice is lovely and kind and funny. I agree with all the lovely comments above!

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  45. I love your sewing - and love the way you can wear pattern so well - anytime I sew patterned stuff I find it overwhelming on me so I am generally in awe of how you make and wear it - I got a few weird comments years ago when I first blogged (really weird - they were not even sewing related) and I deleted them and never had anything like it since. I know for me - reading blogs has been such a game changer for how I sew, I love the way it makes me feel part of some online sewing community and can not believe the generosity of people when sewing advice is needed. I live in the west of Ireland and know so few who sew - so these blogs are a bit of a life line...... anyway love what you do and love the way you write your posts - (especially got a kick out of your post on sewing that shirt for your Dad) such warmth in your writing

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  46. I'm so sorry that you, one of the bright lights of my internet have been wounded (even as I write this I find I am wondering if that is the right word, WTF??) by comments on your blog.

    When I think of words to describe the word that comes to mind first is kind, and then open-minded, original, talented, fun, and ALWAYS a good read, so pay no attention to those who CHOOSE to be offended by words that clearly have no intention to hurt. Is that bad english? oh well.

    Love you.

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  47. I am so sorry that you had to deal with Internet trolls or bullies or whatever rude people call themselves who hide behind a blog comment. You are a shining, bright light and should never feel dispelled by someone who is probably just an unhappy person. I know this is much easier said than done, but when you do encounter one of these idiots, remember many of your readers don't look like you, they do not have your experiences, and may not always understand your baseline, but love what you make and the stories that go with them. I am a white southern libertarian, lfrom North Carolina. NYC is literally a whole other world to my daily life. But every time I read your posts, looks at your clothes, and get absorbed in your stories, they bring a smile to my face. That is what you need to always remember. And as a side note, I have been watching back episodes of Project Runway and truly believe you need to submit an application and get your butt on TV! I would live to see your designs make it to a broader audience! Just my two cents :)

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  48. Marcy, I read somewhere recently that nowadays people love to be offended and how right that is! It has come to the point when I don't post hardly anything on FB in case it reads the wrong way. But this is other people's problems, not yours. I have never read anything of yours that has offended me and if it did I would no longer read your blog which by the way is my favourite. I do not always like your clothes (I am a lot older than you) but I do so enjoy your enthusiasm which is definitely catching! And I always look at the patterns you use because you have a wonderful eye that can make an ordinary pattern look sensational. Take no notice of nay-sayers, they need to get off their butts and start sewing! Please carry on telling us about your wardrobe.

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  49. Thank you for this blog. I read you as fresh, fearless and kind. I so enjoy what you do. Please continue. You make my day!

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  50. I got tired of Brit-bashing. I don't know what happened last November but I don't need to read the sanctimonious cr*p. So i got off Twitter. I admire your grit to keep carrying on.

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  51. I've read your blog from the beginning and have often wondered when I would ever make a comment. Today it seemed right, not to say something in particular, but just to say I'm here reading your blog still because you make me smile. Your fearless sewing has inspired mine and I pray you find the strength to continue dispite the difficulties of modernity. God bless!

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  52. There are people who love to be offended, I think. Please keep being Marcy, a gorgeous sparkling soul who always brightens my day!

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  53. Rock on Oona Balloona! There are so many people that would miss your fun, unique and creative writing on here. Please don't change a thing!

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  54. Just chiming in with another resounding vote of support for everything OonaBalloona.... Haters gonna hate, hell with them....

    I think you're fabulous any way you slice it! And you most certainly do not need to respond to this comment.

    Big love!

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  55. Your blog is a place of such fun and high energy and positivity. Some people get far too offended far too easily these days. Don't let them get you down. You keep being you - the world needs more yous.

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  56. Oh wow. I never read comments on other people's blogs or articles, so I didn't even realize this was an issue on your blog, Marcy. I've been a subscriber since 2012's awesome Sew Weekly days (I do miss that community) and I always love your style, your projects, your sense of humor, your freak outs, your passion. Guarantee we likely don't see eye-to-eye on everything, but who the hell cares?! Keep doing what you're doing and being an inspiration. Love you!

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  57. Oh my oona friend! Every one of your "intentions" has been gloriously fulfilled in my book. That is why I keep coming back to see what you are up to in that sewing space of yours! Perhaps it is your gift (of empathy, understanding, identification) that makes you BOTH a great actress, and also unwilling to offend those who read your words. I hereby give you permission to let go, to be that whom you were made to be and to express yourself with the kindness and humor that so characterizes your words. Lord bless you sis!

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  58. This skirt is beautiful and you are beautiful and your work is beautiful and your writing is beautiful. Thank you.

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  59. I bet none of this happens in Kalkatroona...

    I've said it before and I'm HAPPY to say it again, and again...love you, love your blog, love your sewing, love your creativity...you know I've got your back.

    Now, let's hope your dialogue in this post is read by the people that need to read it.

    xo

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  60. (Tried to leave this comment yesterday via my phone, but it looks like I must not have done it right. Trying again, although it looks like you've got plenty of comments with a similar message -- which makes me happy to see)

    Marcy, it’s so maddening when things like this should divide people who are so obviously on the same side. Your sewing and writing talent is what makes this blog great. What makes your blog amazing is your authenticity, strength, effervescence, and of course the kind and incredibly thoughtful way you respond to all comments. Anyone paying any real attention should know where your heart is. Please, please just keep being you. Xoxo

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  61. Honey, I love the you that you are when you are being you. Please don't stop, or even temper that a teensy squidge.

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  62. I love your skirt and I love your blog. Continue being true to yourself ❤️

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  63. Dear Marcy,

    Your blog is vibrant, exciting and entertaining, it is also primarily about sewing. I can understand why you do no want to offend but the internet is like the city streets not your living room. Your kindness and generosity of welcoming us into your world needs to be balanced with the fact that some opinions hurt. My counsel would be to delete any messages that are not on topic and try as hard as you can not to think of them. You have no remit to please all, only to give joy through your creations which I trust you will continue to do.

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  64. So sad that you even had to write this, but thank you for continuing to share your amazing style and personality with us.

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  65. I love your blog, I love your style, I love your humor and I (sorry) love your hair. Period. Let the haters hate. You are super-cool.

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  66. Marcy, I'm only weighing in to say I love your writing. You should write a novel. I think that every time I read a blog post! Seriously, write a novel. Then any troll who wants to critique your choice of words will have to pay for the privilege as in buy your book!

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  67. First time posting. I come here for the pretty on the regular. So, thank you for the escape. I hope you are able to find a way to keep this space the refuge you and I and others need it to be. :)

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  68. Thank you so much for this post and for your blog as a whole - I love your writing style. As a beginner sewist, your makes are incredibly inspiring to me. And thank you also for articulating something that I’ve been chewing on lately; being a woke liberal and still having to grapple with this idea of having to self-censor to avoid offending someone with the (completely well-meaning and innocent) use of a particular word or turn of phrase. It’s a tricky thing to navigate. And Oona is a person who has voluntarily put herself out in the world, sharing her sewing knowledge with all of us - who, lest we forget, are consuming this content for free and should therefore take ourselves elsewhere if we find something here triggering. You keep doing you, Oona, please - the majority of us here appreciate you as you are.

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  69. I read your blog because you manage to include a real life landscape (Which given politics is completely B A N A N A S right now) AND all the beautiful sewing AND your beautiful personality & humor are all here. What a challenge. You're doing great, I see/hear/read your good intentions in everything and I'm sorry that others have not. It sure is hard time to stay positive if you're gonna be woke, and you help me stay positive. Keep it up, and I will take this blog post as a reminder to SHARE POSITIVE THOUGHTS AS OFTEN AS POSSIBLE especially online. Drown out hate with love!

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  70. Thank you for being you, don't be anyone but you, if you don't happen to be exactly like me, I'll deal with it.
    (Though I wish I was like you because I love exactly everything that you express and that you express it. Thank you.. again)

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  71. This is my first time posting on your blog but I've been reading it for years and love everything about it! I'm sorry people have written things that have upset you - please don't stop writing!! I sew most of my clothes and I read your blog to remind myself that sewing is cool and the world is a beautiful place regardless of the crappy things going on it. Rock on!

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  72. This is also my first comment on your blog but I felt it was necessary. Thank you so much for putting yourself out there and sharing your beautiful creations and ruminations. I have laughed out loud at your posts and smiled and agreed and been impressed and inspired. You have inspired me. And, many many others, I am very sure. Please don't stop!!! As I started to read this post my heart caught because I thought it might have been a Dear Jane letter to your readers/viewers and that made me sad because your blog is a light in a often dark world lately. Please don't go away. We need your bright beauty and energetic thoughts. Thank you for all that you offer us. xoxo

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  73. You very much make my heart sing, Marcie. Authenticity is the only thing that is going to get us through these disturbing days, and you have that. You inspire it in others. You do say things at times that crinkle my brow... that's GOOD! It makes me think, stretch and grow. I am glad you are you and that you are willing to put your unique beauty, inside and out, out here on the inter webs to challenge and entertain this old lady in the Pacific Northwest!

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  74. Beautiful skirt & beautiful post! I'm happy to see you decided to wear it again - despite it's scars. :)

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  75. So many comments offering love and support! You are awesome and I hope you don't change because of other's negativity.

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  76. I love your blog, and I think it would be awful if you were driven off it. Love your clothes, and love that you were Vanessa in the Heights - what a combination! Don't stop.

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  77. FIRST - that skirt is fabulous and it needs to be free! SECOND - you clearly have a grand, loving, and appreciative following. Trolls will be trolls, sadly. And it's getting uglier every day. Keep being your creative self, don't second guess or filter. Because, the trolls are not offended - they are hateful. Ignore them and just keep being fabulous.

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  78. I strongly suspect that at least some easily offended people are not really offended so much as they just like to scold. You are a lovely person inside and out so just keep on being you.

    Love the skirt!

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    1. This. Some people couldn't say a nice thing if their lives depended on it. They get some kind of twisted joy in scolding and tearing others down. Certain things in the world are encouraging this nasty behavior more and more, unfortunately.

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  79. You're awesome and your contributions make a better place for all of us. Thank you for not letting those "who prefer to destroy than build" bring you down.

    The skirt is amazing!

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  80. You are beautiful and funny and forthright and a sheer delight to read. Don't let the carbuncles grind you down. You know that already. Shine on!!!!

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  81. Hey there!
    1. Your skirt is amaaaazing!!!
    2. I love you just the way you are. (that's a song lyric too! Convenient!)
    3. People should assume positive intent and stop getting their panties in a wad.
    4. If a person's very first post on a friendly site is to be crabby, then they need to go home and rethink their life.
    5. Be you! I hugely enjoy your posts, and I'm sorry that the world has made sharing them the tiniest bit unpleasant. I'm mentally sending you the most giant bouquet of flowers in riotous colors there ever was. And they smell heavenly. :)
    HAPPY SEWING AND SHARING!!!

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  82. You make me laugh and you're a breath of fresh air in this sometimes grim world. Sorry people have been thoughtless x

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i thankya truly for taking the time to comment, i love a good conversation-- and hope you know my thanks are always implied, if not always written!