11.19.2013

WOW: would you like some wiggle with that hem?

Since asking if y'all test out in the wild, it has occurred to me that most of the things I make aren't everyday wear. Therefore the query probably seemed a little um yeah, DUH. You make clothes in order to wear them, oona.  

But, especially when the weather gets colder, all I want to make is party wear. NEED MORE SHINDIGS. That said, I had occasion for another Worn-Out-in-the-Wild trial (WOW, if you will forgive the sweeping under the rug of prepositions and articles). My Denim & Velvet wiggle dress had its first outing last night at the 2013 Steinberg Playwright Awards. The beautiful and dreamy eyed Rajiv Joseph was honored, along with the amazing Annie Baker and dazzling David Henry Hwang, and I was eager to get all dolled up with Ruggy. Fair warning, this is not a fast walking dress, I breathed in my most classy voice as we began our stroll down our tree lined, holiday lit street. No worries, my gentleman offered, taking my arm, his wrapped in cashmere. We can mosey.

A ten block walk took us twenty minutes.

and I'm looking at the hem culprit. more evidence here.

After cocktails in Lincoln Center's Mitzi Newhouse lobby, we descended the staircase into the theater. It was then that I realized my wiggle dress might have a bit too much wiggle. The hem, specifically, which was not allowing for much vertical movement. Getting back up these stairs might take some doing...I thought, with only a sprinkling of gimlet infused concern.

Scenes from the honoree's plays were performed, and I had the privilege of reading the stage direction for a gorgeous scene by Rajiv, full of night sky and poetry, involving the Taj Mahal and beauty and terror and pretty much awe-someness. And in order to reach my spot on the stage, I had to climb a stair. Just one little stair. Which, at this distinguished event, I literally hopped over, LIKE A MINI HURDLE. Apparently there's a reason for a back vent, I shrugged later. Ruggy raised his eyebrows. Yes, I don't know why you continually decide that pattern companies know less than you do.

OH THAT'S NICE RUGGY HAVE YOU FINISHED THE BATHROOM YET???

Luckily the front row was filled with our cohorts, so the hop was doubly enjoyable, and perhaps I was not meant to be completely classy that night--the stage directions involved my hollering out crazed bird calls. And as long as there weren't stairs involved, the dress worked. Meaning, I could still sit, stand, and breathe after three cocktails and a plateful of every hors d'oeuvre I could get my mitts on. 

But I'll be adding a vent. Or re-adding, rather, since I was the one who tooketh away in the first (appropriately) bird brained place.

50 comments:

  1. What's in the box? Are those maccarons? How exciting to wear your lovely handmaidens to a fancy NYC event! And thanks for sharing your learning a with us, it's hilarious. I'm sure you were still classy.

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    1. Not handmaidens (thanks auto correct). Hand made. Please don't wear handmaidens

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    2. AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

      Auto correct funnies ;o)

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    3. bwahahaha! handmaidens could explain her difficulty walking, that's for sure. Always weighing one down so.

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    4. HAHAHAHAA!!!

      i try to keep those damn handmaidens under control, but i swear they're getting into the liquor cabinet when i'm not looking.

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  2. Bahahaha! The curse of the pencil skirt. I must confess, these skirts terrify me. I tend to destroy them. Back slits end up five inches deeper than intended, etc. possible to do with my inability to take stairs less than two at a time.

    Sounds like a fun shindig, though, and a crazy play! I need more shindigs, too.

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    1. yes, one must walk like a queen in a pencil skirt. drag or royalty, both work.

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  3. Stacy London has worn an awful lot of dresses like that, for presenting mannequins, sneaking up on people, etc. You bring the shindig with you, no?

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    1. i know, she's always stepping teensily around, right? I LOVE HER.

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  4. In the spirit of "It's better to look good than to feel good," you look maaarvelous!! And I'm sure you pulled off that hop with style and aplomb.

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  5. Wiggle on girl, wiggle on! When you look that fabulous you deserve to be carried up the stairs.

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  6. I swear in every out-and-about photo I see of you (say, at Mood or at a meet up, etc. on other people's blogs - nothing stalkertastic, I promise), you're always wearing something hand made. Maybe it's just the fancy dresses that need WOW testing? Either way, I'm glad you're making them work!

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    1. you know, you're absolutely right. my brain gets on a track and i rewrite history. maybe it's that the fancy dresses sometimes never get a chance to go out!

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  7. I laughed so hard at this.

    Personally, I think that mini-hurdles are well worth it when you look that good!!!

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  8. oh please don't tell us if the bathroom ever actually gets finished, just continue to throw that line out because i laugh every time! no doubt those back vents are there for a reason, i'm sure you hopped with a tremendous amount of style nonetheless! :)

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    1. oh lisa, i have a feeling you're going to enjoy that line for a long, looooong time. AGES.

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  9. hmm well at least you didn't have to, erm, like, BIKE in this skirt. :)

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    1. bike! what is bike? i could ride side saddle on ruggy's motorcycle.....

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  10. I have made this dress twice now (I LOVE a good hip drape) and had to shorten the skirt like you but left them the full width as they are in the pattern, so less pegged. I still have trouble walking without a back vent even in the fuller skirt so massive kudos to you for even being able to walk let alone negotiate stairs!! I adore the flocked denim, awesome fabric choice for this pattern. :-)

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    1. the bit of stretch in this denim truly saved my ass. it was a little jessica rabbit. i can't believe you made this one twice, shortening that front drape was a bear!

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  11. Sometimes I think I'm the only person on Earth who hasn't tried macaroons yet.
    Agreed with Joellestlaurent - imagine if you had to bike in this skirt! #disaster

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    1. get on that, lady. it's sugar, it's french, what's not to love....

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  12. It's worth it to look that good (says the girl that did some serious damage to a wiggle dress whilst drunkenly playing pingpong)! WORTH IT. I love this dress. I'm glad it's getting some airtime!

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    1. aaah! which dress? the yellow one?! i will hurt you if you ruined the yellow one!!!

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  13. Haha I kept reading this and wondering, "Where is her vent?!" Yes, vents are so necessary. The bigger the vent, the faster you can walk!

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    1. not my brightest moment. it was totally wearable in my little 5 foot long alleyway!!!

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  14. Who needs vents when you have a handsome man on your arm to lean on? I did the same thing with my wedding dress! The bottom sweep was a bit small for taking big strides down the isle so I took baby steps, and at one point held it up a bit. I wish I could have been a fly on the wall at your event, it all sounds highly entertaining!

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    1. ha, the small steps probably kept you calm and focused at your wedding, no way to rush :)!

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  15. Couldn't your man just have carried you up there? Or would it have rumpled the cashmere?

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    1. oh. my. GOD. hello, you mad genius. it's lovely to meet you.

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  16. Ha ha ha, well it does look terrific on you. You'll simply need to take the elevator rather than the stairs. I'm currently at work on a wiggle skirt but am putting in an inverted kick pleat rather than a vent.

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    1. oooh inverted kick pleat! maybe that would work better on this one... show us yours, pretty please!

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  17. Love that dress! Love that you make mistakes in your sewing too :)

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  18. IIt is such an amazingly pretty dress!

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  19. Such a pretty dress. Worth the slow walking and hurdle-jumping!

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    1. thanks megan! she's a keeper, just a bit of a fixer upper :)

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  20. Oh, Oona. I'm trying not to laugh at you trying to wiggle without a vent. But my mind-pictures are sooo lol-worthy. Mind you, you're not the first person to read a pattern and think : "hmph! who needs this [fairly important bit], it's unnecessary froufrou AND I SHALL DO AWAY WITH IT!".

    I might have had an incident once. Involving a zip.

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    1. oh, but you MUST laugh. i did. so, did you decide the zip was frivolous?

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  21. I had this same problem with a maxi dress I made out of a rayon challis. I thought I gathered the skirt enough to allow for leg movement, but I was sorely mistaken. If I want to walk in my dress I have to hold the hem above my knees. I'm pro vent all the way.

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    1. i do the same with maxis! i end up knotting them above my knee when i really have to get somewhere :)

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  22. Pshaw! Who needs to be able to climb stairs when one is as fabulous looking as you?! Actually,your story made me chuckle and remember my prom dress - it was a bare shoulders/long sleeves deal, and I almost couldn't raise my arms enough to be able to feed myself at the dinner. Too tight across the upper back or shoulder area is my guess, no allowance for movement. Thankfully my date only guffawed once when I asked him to pass the salt that was directly in front of me.
    There's your laugh for the day :)

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    1. so did your date feed you? or did you lean over the plate animal style? INQUIRING MINDS.

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    2. "Show Mummy how the piggies eat"...

      Nope, I could feed, but it was bad enough *lol*

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  23. " yes, i don't know why you continually decide that pattern companies know less than you do." bwahahahahaha I like this Ruggy character.

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  24. OMG! I can see you doing that hop to get onstage! *LOL* Ummm learning to follow directions is something most of us learned in kin-de-garden...I'm just saying!

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  25. live and learn, sis.. i thought vents suck, but that was back when i only wore circle and drindl skirts.. it took one pencil skirt to teach me that vents are a must (even more so, when you're a girl that rides public bus daily, those bastards have ridiculously high stairs

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i thankya truly for taking the time to comment, i love a good conversation-- and hope you know my thanks are always implied, if not always written!