coffee's on me, debi.

eons ago, back when debi had her last sew grateful shindig, i made this dress.  it was one of several things i made in a desire to play along with my drinking buddy, and indeed it was inspired by a beverage.  or rather, the complete lack of color at my favorite non-alcoholic watering hole.  i wondered if i could make something suitable for the environment, sort of a hipster camo, but not utterly devoid of pizzazz.

enter this linen remnant found at international silks and woolens in west hollywood.  i stopped by when we first hit LA soil, not yet ready to brave downtown traffic.  the sticker shock should've sent me racing south.  man, their shit is 'spensive.  no seriously, they have mood beat, and they do not have the displays to make up for it.  but for the most part, they're very sweet.  well, let me amend that.  the gentleman working the register and naming the remnant prices is sweet.  the lady squinching her eyes and begrudgingly pinching out answers to "where are the multiple remnant boxes and sale fabrics the nice man behind the counter told me you have", not so much.

what can i tell ya, lady, point me to the deals.  times is tough.

so tough, i can't even buy enough fabric to make a proper back!  seriously, do you know how much a cuppa joe at le place du inspiration costs?!  this dress was cheaper than a large latte!  c'est tres cher!  but worth it, my friends. WORTH IT.

i actually cut the back out in a necessity-is-the-mother-of-invention moment.  i had traced out butterick 5032, one of debi's traveling patterns, before sending it on its way to the next owner.  y'all remember debi's brilliant dress, yes?  i was so excited to make my own and join in the sew grateful celebration, i sort of just held the tracing up in front of me and decided it needed no adjusting whatsoever.  conveniently, i come to this conclusion whenever i:

A)  have an impending deadline

B)  just want to get sewing

C)  am drunk.

hey lookie there at that bust dart.  that's not right at all.  nevermind, you, pay no attention to that dubious dart, i was talking about the back.  let's stay on topic here.

so!  i cut it quickly and sewed it swiftly and threw it on and ta daa, like magic, the back gaped and drooped and sagged JUST AS IT SHOULD HAVE BECAUSE I ALWAYS NEED TO ADJUST THE PATTERN BACK.

i knew i could tuck and fix my mistake in post, but visions of my botched pastille dress haunted me.  the horror. like the Thing Under The Bed, just because you can't see it doesn't mean it isn't there.  while wrenching my neck out of whack trying to get a good look at the creepshow behind me, i realized it fit at the side seams... it fit at the waist.... why not just cut that big old gaping hunk out?

so i did.

and i have zipper earrings too.  i know.  i'm awesome.  you so want to be my best friend right now.  especially those of you named beangirl.

i actually had it done in time to play along, but wasn't unpacked enough to take a picture.  why is setting up a picture harder than setting up your sewing space?

"oh hai intelligentsia barista, i'd like a cappuccino!  why yes, i DID make this dress.  how intuitive of you to guess. bien sur, i made my own bias tape to enclose the raw edges, what an excellent eye you possess to notice!  my coffee is FREE?  because i am AWESOME?  why THANK YOU!!"

i don't know, i just kind of feel like that's what my face is saying here.   maybe i'll say it in about twenty minutes. i'm off to get some coffee, yo.

l lika de lace

when you are a complete doofus with your ISO settings: picnik's logo-ish feature to the rescue.

this little vintage number was part of the surprise ending that meg, debi, mena and i trotted drunkenly off to at the end of the big NY meetup.  the very stiff lace is underlined in a turquoise/teal linen from baltimore's own gus woolens.  (oh, baltimore.)  and the bodice is lined in teal silk.  cause i really hate matching.

thaaaaat's RIGHT.  lace, linen, and silk.  smell me.

i got all crafty and used the scalloped edge as my hemline, and really planned it out so the sides would match perfectly.  they did.  until i had to take it in two inches at the seams and totally fukat'ed it.  so i sliced off scallops till it matched.  i may have mentioned this to gertie in our sewing class.  it was one of the many times i earned a raised eyebrow.  her eyebrows are fabulous.

hey booooootaaaay!  i wish i would have ironed the vent.  ah well.  the back didn't originally scoop down this far. i dove about 3 inches deeper than the pattern (mccalls, 7827).  this made the straps fly out, so i threw some darts in there, you can see them if you look quite closely...

don't squint, you'll hurt your eyes!  here you go.  i'll tell you what, when the darts worked, you would've thought i'd just seen my face on the cover of vogue .  i was all I ROCK MY WORLD.  i even had an invisible zip in the stash that matched perfectly.  (black is another story.  i had to make a special trip downtown to get a black zip.  i might have a problem.)

the palette for the evening was teal and red, and my partners in crime pulled it off beautifully for a special edition of oona does it! (see their fabulousness here).  i had a thin burgundy belt, and meant to wear these plaid shoes (debi drooled a little), but after our day on the town the height was staggering... 

oh, do you like them?  i got them at daffy's.  for five dollars.

suck it, beangirl.

say say oh playmate

BEANGIRL.

i almost bought these puppies, just to internet-rub them in your face.

(dig my concentrated look in the shoe mirror.)

hold the phone

beangirl finally sewed something adult sized.

oh my!

no, you don't say!

i still have better shoes.

skirt: marie from burdastyle

tank: zara

earrings: momma-in-law's

belt: daffy's

shoes: steve madden

crappy photos: tribute to beangirl. godsakes woman, go read patty's post on taking a good photo. NOW.

IAAT is the battle cry

i was pretty friggin excited to read that beangirl had created a blog award. i made myself labor through her boring answers to her own questions instead of skipping right to the end to see if i'd won. true to form, she made me sweat and put me last.

this award is totally self serving. see for yourself, she readily admits it:

"These things have to start somewhere, right?  Why not me?  And I mean, I figure I can operate under the time-honored tradition of believing that what is highly annoying in others is totally fabulous in oneself.  Ergo, another meme with which to blatantly promote oneself whilst simultaneously irritating the crap out of everyone else.  Awesomeness."

mucho awesomeness. beangirl, i heartily accept. ask away. be warned that as promised, my answers are gonna kick your answers' ass.

1. what size shoe do you wear? if you wear a size 7, can i borrow your shoes?

i wear an 8. that's right, i'm barely five foot three, and i wear an 8. WIDE. here's an example of a pair that your tiny weird feet will never borrow from my ample metatarsals. go scrounge in someone else's closet.

2. 30's or 60's? 

hippie all the way. 30s would probably be a difficult decade for me, considering the penchant for chapeaus. it's hard to get this much hair under a hat. oh yeah, and the segregation. that could prove tricky.

wow. just did a little research on interracial marriage and miscegenation laws. a washington, dc judge sent a couple to prison in 1959, stating in his verdict: "Almighty God created the races white, black, yellow, Malay, and red, and he placed them on separate continents. The fact that he separated the races shows that he did not intend for the races to mix". see for yourself. it was overturned mid-60s. according to wikipedia, that font of reliable information, miscegenation laws stayed on the books in some states till 2000, good old alabama being the last to go by a statewide vote of only 60% thumbs down on the law. i knew those laws hung their sickly, decrepit heads around for awhile, but not for that long.

you definitely can't borrow these. please, you would break your neck.

3. have you ever kissed someone you shouldn't have? 

no. i know some people answered yes, but i'm not a slut. however, my senior year in high school, i caught my boyfriend kissing someone HE shouldn't have. at a drama club party. in my bedroom, where we were keeping the coats. they tried to hide in the closet. so actually, yeah, i never should have kissed that jackass in the first place.

you could borrow these vintage beauties, they're a little small. in fact they'd rock with that tunic you keep mentioning. but you're never going to finish that, so no boots for you.

4. have you ever been poisoned? was it by the girlfriend of the person you kissed? that is awesomely "knot's landing." 

YES. just about a year ago, i was at a party with my coworkers. we had the upstairs bar to ourselves, but the restaurant below was quite shady. like one of those stephen king lowmen areas that just feel funny. upstairs was happy, lots of dancing going on, and people leaving drinks on tables. i had one mojito, and suddenly when it was time to leave i couldn't walk straight. i had the good sense to attach myself to five of my extremely drunk male coworkers, who walked me home on their way to the next bar. i blacked out on the bathroom floor and when i opened the door it was 2 in the afternoon. ruggy was out of town, and when i told him i couldn't believe one drink did that to me, (i've never had so much as a bad hangover, as i've said before, kalkatroonans do hold their liquor), he told me he was pretty certain someone put something in my drink. then made me promise to never go to a party without him again. i freaked the hell out. i was ready to pack it up and move to ohio the next day, but i hear this is not specific to the city of new york. 

more of an NBC public service announcement than knot's landing. peeps! never leave your drink unattended, and always order something clear. (but above all, always order something. chardonnay works nicely.)

5. who's on your "celebrity free pass" list (top 5)? 

are you ready for me to rock your world? tommy lee jones. ed harris. dave matthews. ray lamontagne. peter frigging gabriel. YOU KNOW I'M RIGHT.

stop drooling.

alrighty, here are my I Am What I Am And What I Am Is All That Picks. sassy, outspoken peeps who i enjoy the hell out of. i could've easily made this list a lot longer. i truly despise the awarding part, so thanks, beangirl! this was awesome!

emilykate: emily kate, beth: modern jax, reana louise: curves pattens and pins, katja: of dreams and seams, laurwyn: quirky pretty cute, lisette: what would nancy drew wear, and meg, of meg the grand, who actually awarded me a stylish blogger award, because as i have stated before i am so very awesome. and bratty. bratty enough to take the award, but not so awesome that i can think of seven more facts.

(but i can think of more blogs. want more sassiness? debi. jorth. don. tanit-isis. patty. oh go have a look at my links list, godsakes.)

SUCK IT BEANGIRL.

dearest diary,

OMG!!! today was the BEST DAY EVER!!!!! i totally fixed my pretty spring dress ✿! you should have seen beangirl's face when i walked into concert choir! last week she laughed SO HARD in home ec when i messed up cutting it out-- well, laugh's on her, because....

TYLER ASKED ME TO THE DANCE!!!

i know!!! she'd gonna HURL when she finds out! i mean, i'm SO not into tyler, everybody knows i'm going steady with ♥ ruggy ♥.

but i'm gonna let her sweat it out until colorguard practice this weekend. she DESERVES it, diary!

☆, oona.

ps: she brought a ❝picture❞ of her tunic in today. whatever, diary. my dress is a vintage pattern, mccall's 5490, it has an invisible zip and facing and handsewn blind hems and everything. i bet she bought that tunic at delia's! HA!